Here we are with an awaking issue of gaslighting in relationship. Starting with a brief introduction of what gaslighting is we will cover the main area of How to deal with gaslighting in relationship. Over psychological studies, it has been found that many people are in a continuous state of disagreement. Where they are supposed to accept that they are wrong even if they are not. Many debates are there over such critical and unclear but most prominent issue. This word got fame in the recent year of Mr. Donald trump’s era that is 2018.
What is gaslighting in a relationship- General Briefings?
It is the most famous quote that a repeated lie get accepted as truth-
Gaslighting is refer to a term in which a person juggle the other person continuously. He uses to manipulate his partner and wants him/her to accept that you are wrong even if he or she is right. This is the situation which leads the victim to fell own and low and cause the lack of self-confident in him. In the end, the victim loses hope and the sense of perception, sense of saying his own identity and self-worth.
The term emerges out in 1944, from a film named as Gaslight. In that film, a husband keeps bullying his wife and made her believe that she is completely insane and is not able to do anything. This continuous pressure made the woman low and lifeless. The man completely pictured the reality of his wife in a way he wanted to show her and took the control of his wife senses just to falsify her.
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In simple words, you can state this issue as unwillingness to listen to someone’s factual arguments and making them realize that they are incompetent and nothing more than a fool. It is a frequent form of disagreement that may cause the other person (partner) in an understate situation. It may take a mild or strong form.
In the mild state, it is fine to listen to the gaslighter’s unreasonable but realistic facts and blames. The victim, in the mild state, does not suffer more but get into a relationship that is inequitable and make him subtle. This is all fine we can say that it is just a natural reaction of someone’s not to be proven wrong. But, in a strong state, it is dangerous and fatal as well.
If it gets carried over a longer period of time, it may get into the form of abuse. Such strong gaslighting affects the victim in nearly an incurable way. It can make someone to doubt their ideas and skills or even make them question their saneness. It can impose serious and negative effects on someone’s confidence and self-esteem. They may not build up confidence again and lose their will power. In most serious situations, gaslighter’s o this to have a control on their partner’s main and body completely, in social term it is not less than emotional abuse.
Signs of gaslighting in relationship
Gaslighting is a very bad habit that many relationships get because of inner negativity. They try to hide their wrong side by covering it fake lies and blaming others. We are sharing some signs that show, you are having gaslighting in relationship or not. Consider this very carefully because it is a matter of life. If you find yourself bounded in such a typical relationship which makes you feel low then think about it how to get rid of this. We have made a shortlist just some prominent signs, have a look below and judge your relationship. Have a look
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- In such situation you start questioning yourself, “am I too sensitive and weak”. You think about it many times a day
- Often you get crazy in that relationship and feels uncertain and confused.
- You are always supposed to apologize
- You are unable to stay happy even if you want to be
- You give excuses to others over your partner’s misbehaviors
- You got the idea that something is not at the right place or in the right situation but you do not know what is wrong with you and your relationship
- You wonder your goodness and question your attitude.
- You become unable to make a decision
All these symptoms catch you with depression and continuous anxiety. Maybe you hear such words from different people but most of the time this situation is led by the one you love the most. If you experience these feelings with a particular person you might be a true victim of gaslighting.
Make it clear that this is not always your spouse that puts you down. It can be anyone from your friends, family, and other persons.
How to deal with gaslighting in relationship?
If you find yourself as a victim and feel like your partner treats you in this way then it is really important to consider this as a problem and skip it before becoming a habit. Gaslighting in relationship can torture you and pull you back off from this can be tormenting and painful. But this is not impossible if you really want to get out of it then you can do it. It is all possible. The cure to gaslighting is all about practice and knowledge. It is the game of emotions and self-power only.
Here we are adding some steps to kick out this control over from your relationship.
Realize what is wrong?
The very first step to solve any situation is to consider what is wrong and what is the actual issue? Then try to see the things from the outside and figure out what is really upset between you and your partner. When you start considering the issue by seeing this from a different perspective it will become easy to feel your partner’s behavior out of emotions.
Sort out the truth from blotting
Write down the facts and figures of your conversation and look at the objectives. Give it some time and find out where the dialogue started to veer from the experience. And write your thoughts on it then, like what you feel about it.
See if the conversation is repeating and you are unable to convince them on your point then here is something wrong.
Do some mental exercise to shift the mindset
Conjure up yourself out of the relationship and continue doing this so far to maintain the gap and a suitable distance. Try to visualize and imagine positive facts and positive sights. You might feel anxiety in this but you will have to do this.
Give time to yourself and let your feelings come out
Accept our feelings and accept yourself. It is ok if you are not feeling good or you are crazy. Acknowledge that everyone has mood swings and everyone has a different taste. Track your mood by using different technologies like Mood Meter and other apps that will help you to see your mood patterns and swings.
Give up on the gaslighter
Well, I know this is the most difficult step for anyone because gaslighter can be someone that is special to you or someone you are committed with. It may be your dream man or from one of your parents. But believe me, it is really okay to give up on a gaslighter. Who is ok to degrade you or make you feel depressed, does not deserve you.
Start talking to your friends
It often makes you feel lighter when you share your issues with your friends. Talk to your close friends and ask them to be honest with you.
Do not run behind right or wrong
It is not compulsory to be right all the time. Leave this debate for a while and focus on your feelings. Decide what you want without judging either it is right or wrong. Try to make decisions for yourself. You often caught up in the relationship and spend hours thinking over useless point hat who is right. This is not important to figure out, but it is important what you feel. If your discussions end up making you feel bad this is really what you need to consider. A sense of emotional and psychological wellbeing is far more important than who is wrong and right.
Acknowledge that you cannot fix it up from both the sides
You cannot make their opinions correct. If they consider you insane or illogical you cannot just change their mind so leave the argument without taking it on nerves. You need to quit this, try to let go of trying and realize that the only person whose opinions are in your hands is ‘YOU’.
Think, either this relationship worth it or not
If this relationship is nothing more than ruling over you than decide3, either it worth it or not. Do not just live the unhappy life with the one you want to hold even knowing the fact that he is not making up with you but gaslighting you on and off. Take the right step at the right time
Turn on the independent support system
Do not get yourself separate from those people who are honest with you. This the habit of gaslighter that he keeps you off from those who open ups the reality as it is. So stay independent in taking your decision and do not get isolated from your honest people.
Gaslighting in relationship might tears you down and end up by making you feel low and unconfident.it is so important for the victim to appreciate his feelings and learning how to deal with emotional senses. This can be challenging to wave off this sort of relationship or getting out of such emotional abuse but if one gives a try then it is really possible. It is better to survive for a few days then ruining the whole life. To get more information about relationships must visit www.voguebabe.com